and the devil spoke to me, and he said this truth: God is a sadist else why would he make pain and suffering the conditions for existence? Pain is the gift he has given us to cherish, it is what keeps entities separate and determinate. If we can only come to know the pain, love it, crave it, we will see to verifying our own existence as a moment of sensation.

in a world of sadists the masochist is enraptured. It is true that agony an ecstasy are the most incestuous of twins.

raw lips
from blistering passionate kiss.
why do i always have bruised skin
from dealing with the feminine?
kisses to punches,
i know i should always follow my hunches,
but sins with this broken skin
tattered together to show you like film.
that i am more than flesh and bone
that pain is unknown to this mound of stone.
you try to replace me but all you can do is clone.
you know that you shouldn't
but you'd still pick up the phone,
me,
im stronger when im on my own
so it was written
and so it was sown.

The water from the Potomac still hung to my skin making the rushing summers night air cold from its invisible touch. I was distracted, staring up into the darkened tree tops watching the glistening fields of fireflies, propositioning each other in ephemeral glory. I thought of you and where you might be, and if this switch that somehow had been flipped off with your departure might miraculously set itself right. I was somehow comforted and sadden to call myself a fool for thinking in such selfish fashion.

Ill see ya when i see ya

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-NNinOL6Mnk&feature=related

What i saw when i died

The question, it is something whispered, unnamed, fragile as the air of parishioners walking upon hallowed ground. The answer, was the violence of the apple, the unveiling of glorious truth that immolated your eyes till they could not see as they had before. The response, was inadequate, unable to qualify the lesson of the experience.

This is what i believe, virtue is something not only cultivated by man but bestowed upon him as a gift from the heavens. Benevolence is something a man must learn and cultivate upon his own. It is through benevolence towards our fellow beings that the greatest illusion, the illusion of separation is dispelled. It is through the prices that i have payed that i have come to this realization. It is through this realization that i gratefully shoulder your burden.

I know that the city lights are powered by broken dreams. At this hour they hum like insects casting amorphous shadows into the engulfing dark. Tiny islands of butchered hope to light the way for the disenfranchised, the ugly, the downtrodden, for if the night exists for one purpose it is to shelter those forsaken by the sun. I am an unwelcome guest in both elements. Somewhere concretely removed, an observer of my own and others actions. I peer seamlessly from the asphalt that grinds like brimstone beneath my shoes and stare up at the night sky which has been given a skyline of perpetual twilight, the stars being buried beneath the millions of tiny laments that light the path of those condemned to a terrestrial existence.

if i ever reconcile myself with the world again
ill stow me weapon but never my pad and pen
if life some how came akin to god send id probably then
stop havin a drug problem
id probably stop botherin the bottle
id probably stop in the church and ask for a bible
but this was all libel
trifle rightness to beget spineless kindness
fakers like that got me lookin at the wine list
to be able to dine on this
a straight diet of remiss rhyme flow
i pack it up for spring and during winter i like to
go
No more connection
im infectious with skills to bypass your detection
im not who you think so just listen to the correction
im a tradesman who was born without and option
the divine saw it fit to fit these hands with destruction